Monday, December 31, 2012

Goodbye 2012

Looking back at 2012 I can say I am proud of myself.

I started the year off pregnant.

 I gave birth to a healthy 7.6 lb baby girl by C-Section on 9-10-12

 She truly is amazing

My children turned 3, and 4.

 Im currently nursing my third child. My kids are healthy. This year has been amazing. besides the fact that our truck decided to mess up today. Hundreds of dollars down the drain. But It is being fixed, and the kids were home with me when it happened.

Here are my goals for 2013

Lose 40 lbs of baby weight
Take a few college courses (midwife school here I come)
Enjoy my children
Get a new sewing machine :-)
Live life
My goals are not to serious, I need this. This year will be great. We need to hit it off with a bang.

Confession: I was bullied.

It really isn't something I talk about or actually have ever talked about. But I want to share my story on all the bullies I had in middle school. This comes straight from the heart and is honestly a very difficult thing to discuss. These are my words, my story, and my life.

She sat in the back of the classroom whenever she could. When the teachers would call on her she would freeze up and feel the warmth overcome her body. Her anxiety levels would rise to a dangerous peak. It was hard for her to be around people even without the drama the other children would cause her. School isn't supposed to be easy, but they made it unbearable. So unbearable that suicide was contemplated on more than one occasion. This 12 year old girl was so beautiful, talented, with a life of bliss ahead of her. Yet, that was not the life she had and was far too distant to see the light.

That little girl was me. I have felt the sharpness of a blade to my wrist. I have ingested too many pills to count. Alcohol was my crutch. Life was too hard to handle for a variety of reasons. Before you say, "Yeah, OK, life is supposed to be hard" think again. Too many people say "just get over it". Then you find that child did in fact take their own life. I was too much of a coward to even be a coward. Those girls broke me, yet I held on for a reason I didn't know at the time.

If you Google Bullying, you will find over 66,000,000 results.

I was harassed, I was bullied. To this day, I can't tell you why. I do not know that answer. Maybe I was too shy? I didn't have many friends? There was nothing wrong with me. They just chose to not like the cute little blond girl that stood before them. My mother said they were jealous. To this day, I do not think she understands how bad it was. (Sorry if you are finding this out now mom) I was miserable, that much was apparent. I did hide it well. There was only one person in the world new how far I felt from earth. She was my best friend. This person knows who she is. We went through the shift together.

To everyone I was a slut, a bitch, a whore. But for what? What did I do? I kept the same boyfriend for years. Yet I was the damaged girl. I kept my head down while I walked the hallways. My long blond hair was shielding my watering eyes. I was lonely, lost and forgotten.

I have been the little coward he ran from a group of girls. I hid from these monsters who were trying to "jump" me. Violence was not in my nature, and I saw no reason for it. What was the point?

Looking back 10 years I can tell you that I only stood up for myself once. It was probably not the best of ways to handle the situation. It was a spur of the moment thing. I was 13 years old. We were in the lunch line in middle school. One of my numerous bullies would be snickering behind me. I could hear her talking about me and saying how much my bra was stuffed. Oh please such a petty thing. Well, I did the silliest thing and I proved her wrong. I did not flash anybody but I pulled one of my 2 shirts open. You could tell there was NO way possible that I stuffed my bra. It got the point across and she stood there moth adjacent. Was it smart? No, but I felt much better. Did it stop the bullying? No, it just stopped that rumor.

My life was full of depression. I was never, okay. I was born sad. Is that even possible? As long as I can remember I would hide from the world. In my own little corner and my bedroom was my sanctuary. The bullying just made me worse. It made me who I am today. Ten years have passed and I have grown into an amazing adult. The wife of a great man, the mother of three amazing children and I am not afraid of the world. I still suffer every day from an ailment I will never know the reason for. I'll always be withdrawn. But I am who I am. I love me.
The person I am is great. I may not like to go out into crowds or be as outgoing as I wish I could be. But I take this road one step at a time. There will always be another mountain to climb. This life is mine and I will not let those who bullied me define my life. The mistakes I made along the way were my choice to make and each of them made me a better person.

When my children are old enough I will share with them my struggle. Hopefully they will listen and understand to not hide. Being open about bullying is important. If nothing is said then nothing gets done. My children will learn from me that this is unacceptable behavior. It has to be stopped, and it starts with our children. Teaching them how to behave in the world is important. They learn by example. Our children are a clean slate when born and it is our duty to teach wrong from right.

Sunday, December 30, 2012

Blog hop!

I just joined my first blog hop! You should join too. Its real easy. Just head over to A Mommy's blog Design.
A Mommy's Blog Design Friday Blog Hop

Cranking up the snow blower

My husband gets to use his new toy; the snow blower. We got 8 inches of snow. Really it's not much but we have a tenant so this is important. He can't shovel ever again because he had back surgery. Honestly he has a 30 lb weight restriction but our kids are over that, besides the baby of course but she's close.

Friday, December 28, 2012

Do you Fios?

Thinking about Verizon FiOS? Go for it!  Get Fios

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I Cannot wait for The Walking Dead to start again!
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Using an existing member's email address as a referral, new members can get $10 as a gift card to select stores. Cash back is credited in the form of a check or sent to a paypal account.

Just click this link and you on on your way!

It's that simple!

Monday, December 24, 2012

What's new

Working on some cute stuffies. They are not perfect. But they are cute.

Saturday, December 22, 2012


Just finished 2 owl stuffies. They are not perfect and I think in going to change a bit. I did this all with my own pattern. Will post pictures soon.

Thursday, December 20, 2012

My child is scared of Santa!

Yesterday I wanted to take my three kids to see Santa at the mall. Well, that did not happen.
When we got there santa was right there sitting in his rather large throne. Lit up Christmas trees all around, and pillows of fake snow. This did not go over well with my children and the hurried off in the other direction.

I figured that if I let them calm down that maybe they will change their mind. We walked around for a bit and went to the play area. I love this mall. Their were a few kids their age, so they had a lot of fun. Baby girl was fast asleep in my baby wrap .
When we went back to Santa they still wanted no part in it. I had them watch the other kids, but no luck.

Maybe next year I guess. Can't say that we didn't give it our all.

Saturday, December 15, 2012

Free P&G coupon booklet

FREE Organize is Style booklet with over $17 in P&G coupons inside
Click here to get your own booklet!

FREE Disney Cars Radiator Springs Playset

Free and easy. My son loves this. 
click here to print your own.

Disney Preschool Printable: Cars Radiator Springs Play Set

Radiator Springs Playset

Friday, December 14, 2012

Such a sad sad day

I was going to wrap presents tonight but it almost seems selfish. I think I will take this time to just mourn the lost little souls. Those poor parents who only wanted to give their children a great life. My heart aches for you. I cannot imagine such a horrible loss.
I will be praying.

Did you kiss your children goodnight?

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Blooming Bath

These baths are just so stinkin cute!! I seriously want one of these adorable flowers! I'm sure baby girl would love it as well. They fit snugly into most sinks and cushion the baby with its pedals. So adorable. Right now you can enter a giveaway for a chance to win one for yourself or another momma. Just click the ling below for Mommy Pr Blooming Bath Giveaway! Ends at 11:59 pm on 12/14/2012. Hurry over!

There it is!

Nap Mat and Pillow Tutorial

So as I said before, I finished the nap mat. It was a success in my eyes. I want to share how I did it with you. I have to be honest, I had a little help. I did not come up with the idea but I used some points from another blog. Simple Dimples. I changed a few things but overall it worked great. Here is a tutorial for what I did. I'm sorry if there isn't enough pictures. I am new to this. I did my best, not too bad for a first time.

Supplies List:

2 yards of fabric for the front and back of the mat
1 yard of fleece or minky fabric for attached blanket
1/2 yard white cotton fabric
8 ounces of fiberfill to stuff pillow
All purpose thread
A piece of 1” thick foam cut to 20” width by 40” length. You can find this at a store like Joann.
40” sew-on velcro ( or whatever you prefer)

Fabric for Applique Letters

Heat and Bond ( I prefer heat and bond lite, purple package)
Fabric Adhesive


Wash your fabrics. Keep in mind that they will shrink.

Making the Blanket:

Cut a 36"x 36" piece from fleece. (I chose a double sided fleece) If not double sided, you may need two pieces or a coordinated fabric for the other side.

Making the Mat:

Cut two approximately 20"x 52" rectangles from your mat fabric to make the front and back.

Cut four 4"x 6" rectangles for straps.

Using your 4"x 6" rectangles place them right sides together with a 1/4" seam allowance.
Sew the two long sides and one short side. Turn right side out and Iron flat.

Sew 3 inches of velcro to each strap. See picture for how I chose to do it.

The velcro goes across the other 20″ end on each piece. So fold it over 1.5″ and iron.
(sew your velcro onto each piece at one 20" end.)

I suggest placing the foam in and rolling it up as you would when it's done.
This step can also be done before or after sewing the entire thing together. I did not do that.
Then mark where your velcro needs to go on the back of the mat. For the straps.
Unfold and remove foam. Sew on the velcro.

Attaching the Blanket:

Lay out the 20"x 52" rectangle.
Lay the blanket on top (right sides together) line up edges leaving a gap on the bottom of the mat rectangle (see pictures).


Fold and tuck the rest of blanket inside of mat to keep it out of the way of the needle. Place the other rectangle right side down on top of it. Pin the pieces together (make sure blanket and straps are tucked inside). It will be inside out.  It will be rather bulky.
Pin straps to bottom, tuck INSIDE mat.

Pin PIN PIN and stitch with 1/2" seam allowance.
Stitch bottom and LONG sides ONLY.
Leave the other end open for velcro and foam insert.

Turn Right side out.

Making the Pillow:

cut two 12'' by 18'' pieces of your white cotton. You could even use old sheets for this. I love to reuse and re-purpose.
Put right sides together and pin down all sides.
Sew down all sides leaving a small hole for your fiberfill and to turn right side out.
Turn right side out and stuff. hand stitch the hole.

To make the pillowcase I cut the fabric 9″ by 24.5″ and the fleece 18″ by 24.5″

Fold the print fabric in half and sew across the back of the 9″ end.
Iron the seam down.
Then fold the fabric in half and iron all the way around. It will be a circle.

Then take the fleece, and fold your 24.5″ sides together, and sew down the side and one end.

Take your print fabric and with right sides together, line it up with the open end of the fleece case and sew all the way around with a 1/4″ seam allowance.
You can top stitch but I didn't see a need.

Making the Letters:

Find a Design or Letters you want to applique.
Place the heat and bond on top of your design, paper side up, and trace your design. You'll need to flip the paper over so when you trace, the letters are backwards.

(backwards letters)

Heat your iron according to the directions that came with the heat and bond. When the iron is hot, place the fabric right (front) side down on your ironing surface and press to remove any wrinkles. Be sure to put the side you want to use face down so you’re looking at the back of the fabric. Double check before ironing!

Now you can cut out your letters, or design.

Carefully peel the paper backing from the iron-on adhesive. If the backing is difficult to separate from the adhesive, tear the edge of the paper a little to get things started, or use a fingernail to separate the paper from the fabric.

Now the letters are cut. I used some fabric adhesive and glued them (Used Fabric-Tac to glue them) onto the mat where I wanted them. Removed foam and zig zag stitched the letter edges.

Replace foam and you're done. Use "Fray Check" if you notice any fraying on the Applique letters. ( used scrap fleece so I did not have a problem)

Easy to roll up, and tuck the pillow and blanket in.

Monday, December 10, 2012

Homemade baby cereal

As you know, I have 3 kids. I have made baby food in the past but never cereal. I dislike those box brands. So I'm making my own. I figured we would start with this. It has worked in the past. My son was 8 months when he wanted solids and by then the only purée he had was cereal.
Do what works for your baby.

Brown rice cereal

1/2 cup finely ground brown rice
2 cups water
Some breast milk or formula

Simmer about 10 minutes. Add breastmilk to get your desired consistency. All done. Freeze the extra in ice cube tray and then store in freezer bag up to 3 months.

Sunday, December 9, 2012

DIY nap mat.

I completed the nap mat I was working on for my oldest daughter. I will be posting a tutorial soon. Life is just hectic right now. I'm almost done the nap mat for my son. Check out these pictures I took. I think it came out great. I can't wait for Christmas.